No bake cookies for the win

If you have butter, sugar, milk, cocoa, salt, vanilla, oatmeal and coconut in your house right now, you should be afraid. Very afraid.

I am about to unleash something here that cannot be taken back, and if you have the aforementioned items lying around, you will either love me or hate me. There is no in-between here, people. So, I will say “you’re welcome” and also apologize right now, since I don’t know which direction this is going to go.


(Insert hallelujah chorus or something dark and scary here. It all depends on how you feel at the end of this post.)

These do not last more than 24 hours at our house. And that is with very little sharing with our progeny. Imagine if we were generous! They would be gone in an hour at most! We could not have that. Better to be stingy and remind them of how they can eat whatever they want in whatever quantities when they are grown ups. 

Technically these are health food. Because OATMEAL. Also, isn’t coconut a fruit or something? (Don’t quote me on that one.)

They are simple. They are fast. Waiting for them to set up is preferable, but hardly an actual requirement. And so chocolatey. Chocolate is my bag, baby.

Now, all I can tell you about the source of this recipe is that it was in this very old, very worn cookbook belonging to my mother. The cover was pink. That’s all I’ve got folks. When I went off to college, I copied it on an index card and never looked back. So here’s hoping I’m not infringing on any copyrights by sharing this with you.  

OH! And I don’t want to hear any blasphemy about adding peanut butter. Do not do it! That is not the real deal! I love peanut butter and chocolate together probably 10X as much as the next person, but now is not the time so simmer down. 

First, assemble the necessary ingredients. 

Grab a 3-qt or larger saucepan and let’s get to work. Throw in one stick of butter, two cups of sugar, 1/2 a cup of milk, a teaspoon of salt and three tablespoons of cocoa. (DO NOT FORGET THE SALT. I have made that error before and the result is bland cookies. Not awesome.) Then crank up the heat and stir it.

Butter and sugar and milk and cocoa and salt…. OH. MY.

You want it to come to a boil, and if you live in a particularly humid climate, you would be wise to allow it to boil for 2-3 minutes. Don’t ask me why, this is just years of experience talking.

Let the chocolatey aroma waft throughout your house…

Turn off the heat and add a teaspoon of vanilla, three cups of old fashioned oats (quick oats are fine, but I prefer old-fashioned), and a cup of flaked coconut. Stir it all up.

Almost done!
Now all there’s left to do is drop them by the tablespoonful onto waxed paper and WAIT. I recommend licking the spoon and the pan while you wait. And cleaning up any errant bits of cookie on your waxed paper. And maybe taste-testing a few, just to see if they are set up yet. 

Let the waiting begin.

We will be celebrating the end of our school year tonight with a Quinoa Enchilada Bake and these delicious cookies for dessert. If any of them survive until dinner time, that is.

For those who prefer their recipes in an easy to glance at form:


2 cups sugar
1 stick of butter
1/2 cup milk
1 tsp salt
3 tablespoons baking cocoa
1 tsp vanilla
3 cups old-fashioned oats
1 cup flaked coconut

1. Combine sugar, butter, salt, and cocoa in a saucepan and bring to a boil. Allow to boil 2-3 minutes if you live in a humid area.
2. Turn off heat and add vanilla, oats, and coconut. Stir to combine.
3. Drop by the tablespoonful onto waxed paper and allow to set until no longer goopy. Makes approximately 32 cookies.

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